  
But before all of them get humped in the face until they suffocate, the Merchant Guild comes to the rescue. And yes, what we are witnessing is another anime staple: An Imitation of Power Rangers. No exploding toy trucks or Megazord though; just a group Cart Revolution.
 
Okay, I lied about one thing: there are explosions that don't make any sense.
Roan gives a facial expression that's better suited for his real personality. I hope it stays like that.
 
Now if you were wondering why those Merchants/Rapists are coming to their rescue...guess what? They're only in it to rape the Archer Guild's ass with high prices. Thankfully, that isn't in the literal sense.
 
And if you were wondering what happened to Creepy, here he is stalking Roan and Co. on their way to Cat O' Nine Tails...and licking a candy cane. It just seems wrong to picture him licking anything or anyone and having him comment on the delicious flavor.
 
We completely skip the whole Payon Cave adventure and return to the purple-tinted land of Old Payon. Roan makes himself useful by standing in front of everyone and telling them what to do, then running away before the monsters respawn.
  
But that doesn't work for very long, since everything there wants to kill Roan (can you blame them?). Enemies include Ninetails (I'll drop the RO spelling in favor of Ninetales, the Pokemon spelling), pissed off Sohees, the same Bonguns and Munaks, and even a few dried up Zombies for some undead variety.
  
Roan thinks he can protect everyone with Devotion, but that also fails horribly. The most awesome part about that is how everyone he's protecting doesn't really care if they get hurt or not because Roan is the only one really getting hurt. It's like they're doing it on purpose!
 
Roan looks down at his crotch in this moment of pain and mutters how he can't do something unspecified for much longer. I suddenly imagine that Devotion's pain penalty is like having Roan get kicked in the balls every time someone else takes damage, and that makes Devotion a thousand times more awesome.
His sanity reaches its limit and he lets out a wanky scream. A pan up to the sky to emphasize how much it is echoing, and a fade to white. Yes, Roan. Run to the light. Never come back.
 
But what luck! Someone with a Heal spell happened to be around! This Heal is much better than Yuufa's though, since it has much stronger "holy fluorescent green" lighting.
And yes, you should already know who used that Heal. There isn't any suspense at all.
Next
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